Lesson

I've been watching Black Love and Red Table Talk. If you haven't had a chance to tune in, it's worth the time. There are so many jewels about parenting, love, life, and relationships. Someone said, "I've learned as much from my failures as I have from my successes. Maybe more." Someone else said, "there are lessons to be learned from your pain." I began to think that maybe we don't learn the lesson from our pain. Maybe we get caught up in cyclic and toxic relationships because they are comfortable. Maybe we enjoy being a victim because there is less responsibility in it. Maybe it's easier not to learn the lesson.

Family

The definition of family is rapidly changing. Nuclear families have transitioned into single-parent, blended, same-sex, childless, foster, grandparents as parents , never-married families. As the list grows for individuals to identify, it seems we have so many options that some simply refuse to choose. I wonder what the next generation will have to lose because we refuse to make family a priority. We don't take care of home because our homes are broken. Family isn't always about blood, but every family should be rooted in unconditional love. We need to be examples of what true love looks like for our children. We need to show our children that no matter who comprises your family, it should be cherished and valued. Family should be the foundation of our value system and society. We should always make family our first priority.

Mother!

I assure you this is not about the psychological horror film written and directed by Darren Aronofsky. I am sure some of you would describe motherhood as a psychological horror. I can admit that I have compared childbirth to scenes from the Alien franchise. I have daydreamed about my own nuclear family. However, as God would have it, I became a mother. No, I am not pregnant. I willingly chose to love, care, protect and nurture two little girls. I willingly chose to be present in their lives. Motherhood is a choice to be present even when all parties involved don't make the same choice. I am a mother. Many of you are mothers. Motherhood is defined by presence not presents. Its definition is not always nuclear. Sometimes, it's blended. Sometimes, it's mended. Sometimes, it's complicated. Regardless, it doesn't negate the fact that you are a mother.